The Devil within Me

Another rewritten exam piece.

At the very moment I stared at the computer, I felt my fingers twitched. Then I turned away and reached out for a book beside it. A tiny pang of joy shot through me as I know that I had succeeded, that I had conquered the worst enemy anyone can face – myself.
Everything started at the start of the year, when my antique computer was replaced by a new one, which my parents bought for me because of my good results the year before. I began to realise what the computer can actually do. I was able to play the games I couldn’t because my previous computer wasn’t powerful enough, but now, no one could name a game my computer couldn’t support. It wasn’t long before I became addicted to computer games. It wasn’t that obvious at the beginning because I only spent one to two hours a day in front of the computer, but gradually, it grew to be six or seven hours as the urge to play grew continuously. I was soon taking over my friends in both the number of hours spent playing per day and the amount of homework that was left undone. However, there were only a limited number of hours a normal person have in a day, so I began to sleep lesser and lesser. Bed time was ten, but, because of my computer addiction, it became later than three. My parents knew nothing about all these because I would pretend to fall asleep first, and then lock the door and before returning to my virtual world.
Despite the fact that I just barely passed the first exam that year, I did not put more effort in studying. The exam which determined whether one could advance to secondary two had passed, and I failed four out of six subjects, and getting a mere pass for the remaining two. When my parents questioned why my results were so bad, I lied and told them that I was feeling unwell during the examination period, and they believed me. I felt bad for lying to them, and there was only one way to redeem myself – to get good results for the retest, that took place two month later. That was when I told myself I had to get rid of the devil that was riding me.
Sometimes I wished that they knew the truth because they would make it a lot easier for me to kick my bad habit. My first attempt to do so was a failure. I tried to force myself to study, but, being under the same roof as the computer, I ended up playing computer games. Then some of my friends suggested that I try not to stay at home. I thought it was a good idea so I tried it, and it worked. After school I would go to the library to study, or play some sports with my friends. The effect wasn’t immediate, I still play the computer every day, but I began to spend less time playing and more time studying and sleeping. There was a period of time I gave up and returned to playing more than seven hours of computer games per day, but with so many friends caring about me and reminding me what was more important, I did it.
I used to wonder why people fought so hard for freedom, but have I dreamt that I would be one of them. I have fought hard with the devil riding me. Now I can stand in front of the computer and tell myself that, no, I’m not going to play the computer. I can study in front of the computer without getting distracted, so I proudly claim that I have won the battle with that devil and that I am free.
As I looked at the look I held in my hand, I realised that it used to be one of my favourite books. I flipped through it, and then slammed it closed. A short while later, my brother saw my dragging a huge box of books into the storeroom and locking it. “What... ... what are you doing?” he quizzed. “Oh, nothing much,” I replied, “just treasuring the freedom I fought so hard for.” My brother gave me a bewildered look, but I ignored it and returned to my room.